You Are Your Greatest Resource

As within, so without.  

I have worked in the field of counseling, coaching, spiritual awakening and healing (with verbal therapy) now for fifteen years. What I have learned in this process about my own journey, is everything I have ever needed was found within me. Courage, clarity, inner strength, detachment from drama and trauma, confidence, peace, calm, wisdom, connection, and more, I have found all to be present in my own self.

With that knowledge came the greatest gift of all, personal freedom, my sovereignty. The deep knowing that no one truly has the power to make me happy or unhappy. I am in charge of everything that has to do with me. This is without a doubt, the most significant, and personally empowering mindset I could endeavor to have for myself and, to assist others in having for themselves.  

We are largely and unfortunately taught the opposite. Beginning with our early formative years parents, grandparents, older family members, caregivers and teachers wield authority over us (as is necessary for our protection). However, when we become adults and have the ability to make sensible decisions for ourselves, this message is not usually modified to the truth, which is: we have the right to our own authority.

Our education and community values are based on rules, compliance, and rewards for obedience. Because of this fundamental belief system which says we are not our own authority, we are also not responsible for what happens in our lives. Our boss can fire us and has the power to promote or provide a raise. The housing market determines the cost of our home. The bank decides if we get a loan and for how much. The school determines what our children learn. Society norms dictate our family structure.  With so much exterior influence it is no wonder we do not feel in charge of our own lives. With such a phenomenon existing as a guide to how we live, it can be of little surprise we do not see ourselves as our own source of power and authority. We mostly forsake our free will to that which we have been conditioned to believe we cannot change or influence and, ironically, is “for our own good.” We succumb to accepting what small amount of personal decision-making ability and permission we are afforded.

When we are conditioned to yield to outside authority for virtually every decision, we do not feel in control of our life. When we don’t feel in control of our own life it follows we also take no accountability for the decisions we do make because it may have felt our choices were limited. This feeling of personal entrapment can also spawn emotions sourced in anger, resentment, and blame. We have unwittingly embraced a lifestyle void of personal empowerment, free will, and sovereignty.

How did we arrive at such a place of submission? The answer is simple and yet complex. We succumb to the authority of society, family, and other norms because we believe we need something (approval, acceptance, protection, love, etc.) from these sources which we fear may be withheld if we go rogue and actually begin to think and act of our own accord. If we dare to lead our own life. We are taught and conditioned to believe we may be unworthy or undeserving of love and acceptance if we step outside family and social norms. We may fear this loss and give in to being obligated to comply.  Dispirited and submissive, we may then, against our own inner voice, begin to preach and practice the same values.

If we reflect long and deep enough, however, (through meditation, prayer or other forms of personal inventory), we might begin to hear our inner voice which beckons us to remember who we are. We are in fact, highly evolved beings who can never truly lose our truth but could possibly have forgotten it for a time. And so we begin to remember.  We remember we do in fact, contrary to how we have been conditioned, have the power to carve out an existence we deem to be for own highest and best good. We remember we have the right to make our own decisions even if they are contrary to the opinions and norms dictated to us by even those to whom we are the closest. We have the power to make all the right (and possibly not so right) decisions for ourselves.  And we learn.

In this awakened state of mind, where we practice free will and personal sovereignty we have a deep inner knowing which guides us to embrace a further truth.  This further truth is we no longer need the structure and rules of our social climate which dictate to us our behavior. We know that in embracing free will and personal sovereignty for ourselves, we would never compromise that of another. We trust ourselves to treat others as we would endeavor to be treated. We have all that we need within us.  We have self-governance, moral compass, right action, peace, calm, gentleness, a voice and a choice in everything we do. We are free of the lie that said we needed an outside source to provide us with that which makes us the very best version of ourselves. The very best of us comes from within. We are our greatest resource.

We are in fact, highly evolved beings who can never truly lose our truth but could possibly have forgotten it for a time.

First published in Radiance Magazine Sep 1st, 2018